User blog:TheElectraFroot/A Longer, More Boring Version of My JD2018 Opinions

I already opinionated all the songs on the Just Dance 2018 page, but to make you go through a bunch of suffering, I decided to put this here. Basically it's what my original comment said, only edited to be longer and more boring. So without further procrastination *realizes that I just procrastinated writing the word "procrastination"* I will now write a boring blog about something extremely lit right now. Once again, the order of tracks judged here depends on its order on the page.

The Way I Are: "Baby Got Back"? More like "Bebe Got Back" in this case! I like how they brought back the "Music video as part of background" idea from Just Dance 4 and that one Hip Hop game that wants to be mentioned but won't because nobody really remembers it or gives a s**t (just kidding). To be honest, even though I haven't listened to Lil' Wayne, I think he'll nail this track down like Kendrick Llama* nailed "HUMBLE". I'm super excited. (now if only we don't have another panda, OH WAIT A F***ING MINUTE)

Rockabye: '''Finally. '''After listening to this and "Rather Be", I had the desire of Clean Bandit getting into Just Dance. Now that desire has come to life! So far, the routine is kind of simple, but we haven't seen all of it, so I don't know. (Now if only they don't add "Rather Be" because, honestly, they add the best to the games, which is really stupid.)

24K Magic: Knock knock, who's there, it's Bruno yet again and this time he's bringing twenty-four misheard carrots and two men who were born as spoiled as Kim Kardashian will ever be. I can't exactly detail the routine (actuallyyesIcanitsthetotaloppositeofmyfriendshiporsomethinggoals) but this basically says, "Ay, we bring you the sons of a snobby rich mom." On another note... don't ask me about the word "rocket". It's not science.

Side to Side: Now this is science! I don't understand why they would match a song about "rocket" (#NowYouHaveADamnIdea) bicycles to the word "intergalactic". To be honest, if they chose Break Free for this game instead of Just Dance 2015, it'd make perfect sense. But we're not Ubisoft and we're definitely not a part of their minds, so...

Automaton: For a while, I thought this was instrumental, until I realized it had lyrics. Before you go, "OH MY GOD CHRISTINA OF COURSE IT HAS LYRICS", note that I hadn't listened to the song before E3 came.

Chantaje: It's like El Tiki got a makeover (both players), but P2 clashed so hard with every Shakira song. And then dyed her hair with slightly drugged grape juice.

Bubble Pop: Bujeezis. That background is brighter than my future.

Love Ward: And this is the rare side effect of Benedril. This is basically Toxic, but she summoned up a Miku demon that took over, so the Just Dance team just decided to record a routine of this blue-haired "murderer"- err... nurse.

Daddy Cool: Why would they change the routine? Couldn't they just keep the original routine (probably relicense though, but I'm no expert in game-making, so...), and update the quality? The Way I Are already has a panda, so no need to over-panda. Before you know it, every single routine revealed at E3 will be beta and the final versions will include the panda. (oh and I expected more songs from the 20th century. that's disappointing. i'm sad.)

Make It Jingle: The first time they let a drag queen into Just Dance and a butt-thrusting reindeer was all they could think of... but seriously, they confirmed Rudolph's danker cousin and, trust me, he somehow learned how to twerk. Overall? I'm excited for this also.

Naughty Girl: Why hadn't I heard this before E3? And why am I cringing at the thought of the Panda wearing this coach's outfit?

TBA (Katy Perry): That song is lit.

TBA (Natoo): Not as great as Katy's TBA.