User blog:TheElectraFroot/I May Have Depression

First of all, this is not a cry for attention. If you think so, please understand that it isn't. This is not clickbait.

Okay, for the past few weeks (or months), I've been feeling useless. There's been so much stuff going on in my life that I feel like God is trying to tell me I am just a huge mistake. I mean, my mom died from cancer back in 2012, and my dad got caught with drugs. I live in a hell designed to be a heaven with a grandma who doesn't understand how I feel all that well. She just doesn't want mental illness in her household. My life is just messed up with no way out.

Then there's school. Damn, where do I begin with school? Well, it's horrible. Nobody gives a damn if you have depression. My friend moved to another school and my sister's not in the same one as I am (she's in high school). Even if they were here, I wouldn't get any shot to talk to them (with the exception of a few times). Anyway, we have popularity and our way of choosing who is popular is unfair. The popular girls get all the VIP things because they're princesses. My grades are nice, but the teachers go overboard. They could yell "PRIDE!" and slam an entire damn packet in front of you to be completed in, say, five seconds. That just exaggerating, but it's kind of like that. I manage to get by academically, but socially I'm a mess. I have only two friends but they belong to popular groups, so I am not associated with them. I can try to talk about it with them, but I don't think they'll pay attention. I've cried twice at school, and I've cut myself twice. Just today I swallowed two pills and I'm thinking of ending it all tomorrow before anyone wakes up.

Bottom line, I think I have depression.